Wednesday, April 03, 2013


How did you spend your day? Did you spend most of it agonizing over which was the best, safest, most effective way to rid your five-year-old of head lice? Me too!

We took the easy way out. No more combing, untangling, or screaming ("I've got a very sensitive scalp." he likes to remind me.). And we'll only have to buy shampoo like twice before he graduates high school.

There was no walk of shame when I went to pick the kiddo up at school after THE PHONE CALL. Today was the first day back after a 2 week vacation, and there were a decent sized handful of kids in the office, scratching their heads. At least we weren't the only ones, not even the only ones in his class, leaving much less of a chance for ostracization. It's not that we hadn't noticed his itchiness over the break, and I checked for lice many times. The problem is, I was looking for fleas. I was looking for something flea-sized, anyway, on his scalp. I've only ever had cats and dogs, and flea checks are a regular occurrence. But Samson is my first human pet, and it turns out that I simply didn't know what I was looking for or where. Once the professional head-examiner at school pointed out all the nits to me, it was like HOLY SHIT MY CHILD'S HEAD IS INFESTED and WE NEED TO BURN ALL OF HIS SHEETS AND CLOTHES IMMEDIATELY.

Thankfully, it doesn't really work that way. And best of all, I get to see the kid's forehead for the first time in 3 1/2 years.

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